Extending loving kindness toward ourselves, people we love, or people who hurt us is essentially having compassion for ourselves and others.
It is not usually difficult to conceptualize the benefit of exhibiting loving kindness towards ourselves. While many may still regularly practice negative self-judgments and self-criticism, most recognize that loving-kindness toward ourselves is a desired outcome on the path to healing.
Things get difficult when we are asked to extend loving kindness toward others — especially someone who hurt us. This is a difficult bridge to cross.
Some elements of this practice would be to let go of seeking revenge and to let go of anger.
It does not mean that you invite this person back into your life and act as if nothing happened.
It does mean that you turn your attention back to your current life and your future goals. Your energy is directed toward where you are and where you are going. Your attention is not focused on the past where you continually play out the poor behavior of the other person and re-live the trauma.
People do not flourish when they take a “victim stance” and continually blame the other person for the hurt and pain they caused. Fantasizing on ways for the other person to “pay” for what they did prevents people from living their own life.
It may not be possible for you to wish love and happiness for the other person, but perhaps you can develop an understanding of why they behaved the way they did and develop some empathy for their situation. Perhaps you can find a middle path where your thoughts toward the other person are neutral — you do not wish them good will, but neither do you wish them pain and suffering.
In the end, turn your focus toward living your own life and be the best version of yourself that you can be.